justplainbil

Just Plain Bill

I will not say phooey!

I imagine most of us have grown up under the admonition from our parents not to say certain words. The words that usually made the “no-no” list were cuss words or other derogatory terms, or names that often came from school playground chatter – as well as cuss words often used by family members or friends who visited our homes.

When called a name, our parents often recited the old verse, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names can never hurt me.” As I’ve grown to senior citizen status, there have been innumerable instances when those “names” truly did hurt – and still do. I know those “names” could also contribute to one’s sense of value, self-concept, and how he or she viewed his or herself over the years. Self-concept, self esteem, and even self-loathing may be fed by these “names”, if repeated and internalized often enough.

My first contact with “no-no” words in my family occurred when I wanted to accompany my dad to the grocery store. He said “no” to my request, and I responded as a little five year old might by saying “phooey.”

In addition to a swat from my dad, I had to write, “I will not say phooey” 100 times on the chalkboard in the hallway of our house. I must admit this kept me from saying phooey for most of my life, and quite possibly kept me from repeating far more negative or “dirty” words in my younger years.

Upon the passage of so many years and having become a parent myself, I realized that what my dad most likely punished me for was what he interpreted as “talking back.” 

As I’ve matured, I’ve also come to realize that the contributions I made over the years to discourse, discussion and debate is enhanced when I remember to “not say phooey” – to not “talk back.”

What about you?